You’re outside of your element, doing different things, relaxing more, maybe imbibing in a few adult beverages if you like. What a glorious time! There’s only one problem, and you don’t tell anyone. You haven’t pooped in 3 days. Your stomach feels a little like Walmart on Black Friday if the doors were suddenly fused shut. You try to ignore it and try not to let it bother you. You might spend some extra time in the bathroom ‘shaving your legs’. All to no avail. Pooping on vacation can be SO TRICKY!
Well, lots of things. First, your body is outside of its safe zone, making it more challenging to go in the first place (poop psychology Y’all.) Add in the facts that you’re probably not drinking enough water (ahem, mimosa breakfasts anyone?), not eating all that great (Um, VACATION!), and that you’re most likely not moving your body as much as usual (What kind of vacation do you think this is?!) and you’ve got the perfect mix for a sh*tstorm. Or lack thereof. Constipation is lame.
So, let’s be real, not getting your poo on is the WORST, and pooping on vacation is tricky enough without
You are NOT alone!
Y’all. This happens to ALL OF US. While I’m not encouraging you to start discussing your bathroom habits with everyone on the city bus (Don’t be that guy.) just know that you’re not alone. For real, I was just at a conference for Whole Food Nutrition where we talked about this. I mean, it’s a group of people who typically eat healthily, take extra steps to ensure a healthy gut, exercise on the regular, and drink all the water. And yet, it still came up in conversation that the bathroom gods were not being as generous as usual.
Want to know a secret?
I’m a stealth pooper. It’s like the world’s crappiest superpower because it’s not like I can brag about it. I can usually take care of business in the same amount of time as it takes for a regular old bladder release. ARE YOU NOT IMPRESSED?! Come on, it’s awesome. You’re jealous, you know it.
It’s not a 100% guarantee every day though. After all, I DO Have Celiac Disease, so there’s always a wild card. But usually, I’m one of those lucky people. Even while traveling I typically go every day. How do I do it? Part of it is lucky genes maybe because my kids are stealth poopers too. But I do have a few tips…
Water all day every day. I drink So. Much. Water. I love water, so this is a non-issue. If you don’t like water, try just adding a glass before you eat, when you start a new fun vacation activity, when the clock has an 8 at the end, whatever works for you! Build it in to your day, even your vacation day, and your body will thank you! And if you’re imbibing in adult juice, add a glass of H2O in between each drink.
Get up and walk around. We road trip ALOT. But I make a point of making everyone get out and run around every few hours. I know it sucks to get off the lounge chair by the pool, but getting up to move can help, ahem, OTHER things move.
3. Drop the shame!
Everybody poops! Don’t believe me? I think there’s a great book out there for ya. Check the children’s section of your local library if the one I linked doesn’t work for you. Seriously though, I know it’s hard to not freeze up when someone walks in the public restroom while you’re doing your business, but I promise you, they do it too. Nervous about someone
4. Whole Foods. EAT THEM!
Leafy greens, fresh fruits and vegetables, whole grains, the whole 9 yards. Again, we road trip a lot. It can be kind of hard to have all that stuff in the car, but we make do. Fruit travels well and makes great snacks. Fresh veggies, when kept cold, can be a great treat too. But our absolute favorite way to ensure we get enough while on vacation or driving some ridiculously long distance is Juice Plus. It travels easily, takes 30 seconds to get into our bodies, and gives me peace of mind. Oh, and it helps keep us regular!
Did this help you? Or at least make you laugh? Perhaps you think I’m insane, but a fun insane. Wanna hang out? Anywho, that’s my take on vacation poops. You’re welcome.